An Irresistible Parasite : Social Media

There is never a time in history of man that does not evidently states the curiosity inside him.

We live, not in a world made with concrete and steel, but rather a wobbly ever-changing slime.

I know it is hard to believe that but it is true. A solid sphere yet ever-changing core (no, not the magma).

But within this life, do you change? Even a bit, voluntarily?? I am not sure of your answer. I don’t see any change in the world of social media, where you present yourself with the same person who signed off late last night. I mean, yes some may need post consistency for their page, but still you need to improve every day.

Then what appreciation do the cells in your body get for dying after just 120 days of their birth?

I think I just understood your silence. This same question struck me too when I had realized what damage I had done to my so-called future life. During the days I was younger (around 15 years old); I gained the maturity to understand the true power of the social networking. There was a time Facebook grabbed me for hours and hours, then came the Instagram lollipop – from which I am still keeping a distance.

This was the time I saw and experienced the dark side of social media. No, I didn’t get cyber bullied.

It was way bigger than that. I realized social media was a little irresistible parasite which can infiltrate in your life, either positively or negatively.

PRESENT DAY: I always try to create something new on my social media, try to get engaged with new people and always have a craving for new characteristics in old friends, learning new social skills.

But this experiment is not everyone’s cup of tea, or mine too. I can still make my day worthwhile with completing small targets of positivity.

This blog post, I think, is special, because it took more of me than any other blog posts and also because this kind of self- realization is varies from individuals to individuals.

All in all, get creative with yourself and make sure your social success curve is always increasing!

So have you had this realization or are you in still water??

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Myths about friendship….

Below are 5 major myths that have stayed with us( I don’t know since when).

  1. It cannot be constant between girl and a boy, eventually one of them will fall in love. It is not true at all. Because it is a universal law, that like repel like and unlike attracts each other. And as we (boys and girls) are opposite in various manners, so we attract each other. Hence girls like to hang out with boys more than with their girl friends. You know the saying,” Less drama for girls with boys”.

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  1. It has no word like “privacy” in its circle. Friendship is not about boundaries. If it has no air to breathe, it is not a friendship. It’s our own choice with whom we should share which stories. That is, if I want to share my personal life with my new friends but not too much, I would stop wherever I need to.

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  1. If they are not committed, they have to be brother and sister because you know… Society. Well, according to our society, if a boy and a girl are not married/engaged they have to present themselves as in bro-sis relation otherwise they will not let you go ahead and live happily ever after. And I mean literally live happily. For example, no live-in relationship, no presentation of love in public etc.

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  1. The trail of achieving “friendship goals”. Ever tried your best to hold onto a friendship which in reality cannot be held? Well try to relax and be yourself, and let things (in this case, that friendship) go their way. If they are coming back to you, let them and be happy otherwise boost yourself up with optimism and go on with your life.

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  1. New friends! Let’s categorize them into different circles of your BIG friend circle. Well it is the new trend going around the block. People coming to you with their friendliness and intention of making you good friend of theirs; get stopped by your own mindset and indirect-“not so much friendly”- replies. And then the thought process starts. You think that THEY are avoiding you or they are not your type of friends because you have a set of friends who are very close to you. So you interview these newbies and select and categorize them into different kinds of friendships. For e.g. the “hi- how are you? Friends, the hi…hi…hi… *seen and no reply* friends and many more.

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So, at the end I want to say,” Keep it simple, silly!”

Perfection 2.0

In my previous post on “perfection”, I stated that anyone can create their ‘perfect’ world, life or career.

But now, I’d like to elaborate more on this topic with a different perspective. You know about the saying- ”Nobody is perfect”, but I say NOBODY WANTS PERFECT, NOBODY LOVES A PERFECT PERSON.

We chase perfection in every facet of life, even though we know we can’t achieve it and in this vicious circle of chasing and not achieving, makes us fall into the pit of disappointment. And there’s a humongous role of the crowd in poking you into that pit.

Suppose you have achieved perfection and celebrating it with the world, there comes one person pointing at you and yelling that you are not perfect for so and so reasons. With that mark of dishonor, you lose out your ‘perfect’ status. Hence, nobody loves perfect.

So what you got to do now if not chase perfection?

Did I mention that we need not to chase perfection? No, we should chase perfection and fall into that pit of failure. BUT we should come out of it by learning something from that failure and be better than what you were before.

If you know about the saying,” If you aim for the moon, you will at least be among the stars”, then follow it!!

I’d like to add one more thing. Recently my physics teacher gave a speech, which taught me the importance of INTROSPECTION. It means to examine or observe one’s own mental and emotional processes. And you might think why I’m correlating this word to my post. Well it has a positive role in chasing perfection. You introspect yourself every day. You examine and evaluate your mental and emotional state and CHANGE according to your plan. When you change, you have done something new, something creative, something forward in your life!

So, with accordance to my previous post, create your own perfect. You create a new YOU while introspecting yourself – everyday.

Chase perfection and achieve excellence!!

 

 

 

Farewell 2018…

Time. It makes you think it is fast as sand slipping off your hand when you are on an edge and is slow when you don’t want to live in the moment. But my friend, trouble is that you think you have time, yet it will always be YOUR time.

Bidding goodbye, relishing those moments of childhood spent at that one special place, YOUR PLACE, and just attempting to grab that time again, I stand in my school, my second home since 15 years, cherishing some moments of my last school year.

Crying unreasonably, watching my mother leaving me in an unknown environment( Pre- Nursery class) and cribbing at my inability to hug her tightly. That old school corridor- now admin block- makes me remember that. There is one photographic memory in my mind that I can’t wipe out is that our activity time and our whole class working individually on their desks, competing each other, making fun of each other, and I sitting there putting the beads one by one in the thread silently.

I would like to mention a very special date – 25th December of every year !! why? Not because  Christmas but because every year our school’s Annual Function was either on this date or on my birthday the 22nd of December. So I always felt the whole school celebrated my birthday !!  Yahooo!!

Another memory  is of class First.There was only one time when our class was performing a ballroom dance and it was my birthday that day, plus the boy who was my partner had a fight with me 😛 ( It was Arjun). I said to him that I will not share my toffee with him because he fought with me but on stage we danced happily together and the toffee was forgotten…hahahaah..

Now as I grew up, my class got a huge strike in 4th , when class of 25 changed to 34, with that came some new school mates some of them  now you know very well as Anurag, Ashish, Tanish, Nakul, Shefali, Suraj…. And many more.

Okay so taking a leap to 6th, our whole class was one team, whether it was a soft board competition or a pre-summer break party. Oh! those parties were just unforgettable! And how can I forget about the Maggie Wednesdays!! Our weekly day in canteen with variety of homemade Maggie.

Coming to the best part of our lives, the 10th. Now honestly, I would pray to god that I would like to relive the 10th grade, not that I don’t like 12th class, but that class is the core of my school life.

I have to say, the best part was how we managed to eat our lunch  in between classes and finishing it even before our recess, and  studying  at the same time ,was just remarkable.

Those  talks with Rituka mam and Alok mam on various general current topics during the class were the best because it was the only time when the strictest teachers were laughing with the class, and not scolding students.

After this, there wasn’t much of our class left when we entered 11th. Some left the school, some had different streams and some even left the city. 11th and 12th grade was one giant year altogether.

But still the Lily section always stayed at hearts of all those students who were in it.

All the best to all my schoolmates and juniors for the future!!

Be in touch with each other, maintain that lily section even after we are not sitting in the same room now.

Expectations and Emotions…

Well people, you all have heard the above two words but time and again, these get confused with each other.

Firstly let me enlighten you with the original definition of both the words.

According to Oxford Dictionary,

  • Expectation – refers to think something is likely to happen or in more interpersonal means; to think someone is likely to do or be something.

  • Emotion – refers to an instinctive rather a strong feeling as opposed to reasoning such as joy and anger.

Now that we have known clearly what these two words really mean, lets come to the point of confusion between these two.

To make you understand the confusion well, lets take a basic example.

Suppose you have lent some money to a friend. He said he will return back your money soon enough, but many days passed he does not intend to give back the money. Now you know he is ‘expected’ to return the money to you but he hasn’t. Also you can not ask him again and again, it would be embarrassing for him as you are a good friend. One day, your friend returns back the money and says “sorry for the delay”. But you are ‘upset and angry’ at him on the delay, so you rub him off and walk away. Period.

*Disclaimer: This is a very generalized scenario. Exceptions may be there.*

In the above story, the person attached his/her emotions to an expectation which led to lack of communication between the two and eventually ended up the relationship.

People generally do this practice. They do not keep expectations and emotions at different ends and tend to lose more social life. With an added techno-emoticons today, this mix up gets more complicated. You are already not talking to them in person, you are also blocking them on Facebook or Whatsapp, a regular reaction which is a very damaging behaviour with ripple effects in this time of century.

You might be thinking,”How I handle this confusion?” and since I am blabbering about it, let me tell you my mantra to get rid of some part of this confusion –

I don’t expect anything from anyone which leads to zero disappointment and total surprise of upcoming “Unexpected” acts.

And you would think again,” What about the emotions?”

Well, emotions get cleared up when there are no expectations in the equation. You just be positive and be stress free, much more clear in mind.

So, now to sum up my post, I’d like to say one last thing,

“Let the unexpected come and feel all the after – emotions as much as you can, because you are only a human being.”

 

The World of Poetry…

For a philosophical person like me, who had never even tried writing a single poem in her life or even recite a rhyme ( yeah that’s somehow true), poetry enlightened me with the profound world of writing. It all started when my friend recommended Mirakee app. First I researched on it. Then checked its authenticity. Well, then I obviously didn’t know much about writing a poem, so I searched.

“ Poem refers to a piece of writing in which the expression of feelings and ideas is given intensity by particular attention to diction(somehow involves rhymes) rhythm and imagery.”

Although I had read some poems in my school life, also understood them quite well but I somehow could not form one myself. I always thought that poems are writings with rhymes and sometimes in free verse. My very first attempt ceased to only one line of a verse “ Someone in my life…”, because I could not think of another relatable word that rhymes with ‘life’.All I got was “wife” and “knife”, well, you know I can’t use neither.

BUT when I opened Mirakee, saw the writings of other people, I said to myself,” uhhh trying doesn’t kill you”. So I started with writing a quote on a particular challenge they(Writers community) gave us, i.e. “Daymare”. Then challenges came with poems and it established a love for poetry in me. I started to like poems and get inspired to write some of my own.

I learned many new forms of poem writing, such as Haiku, Triolet , cinquain and Tanka. The more I search on it, the more curious I get.

“For the clouds know that,

I have *tenalach with rain,

For it showers pearls.” – An example of Haiku, which contains three lines of sequence 5-7-5 syllables.

*tenalach – Irish, means a deep relation with the nature.

I was addicted to it. I wrote around 50-55 posts on Mirakee in one month, which is so much more than my blog posts. I had in mind that I have to write on many things on my blog but couldn’t do as I have my school responsibilities.

Apart from this, I was reading an article on frontal lobe development, and it said that doing new thing or trying new hobbies can enhance your frontal lobe activity, new hobbies such as poetry, painting etc. I was happy that I started poetry.

With this added benefit, I write poems, one-liners and learn a lot about poetry.

Why our new generation needs a brainwash?…

Ahhhh… A topic worth debating. It is always controversial as there are two sides which gives out their best facts BUT the old base always wins. You would say that I too am a part of this new generation then why am I not leaning to its rules? You would think of me as a traitor to our own kind(hahahhahaha).

Well I am a part of it but I’m not turning into some hopeless stranger in known world or to say living in a bubble. I have my own opinions about this debatable topic and its my choice to choose which side to go. And this comes to my point of writing this topic.

People are trying hard at getting anything or even anyone. They even try hard to get feelings and in that process they have forgotten the basic principles of living a life. I am not teaching you that. I am just telling you all that this “trying too hard” attitude will never get you anything. 

We live in a self-made virtual reality that we have forgotten the line which behold the definite separation of the real world from the World Wide Web. 

Technology is only a boon if used correctly and efficiently. We are taking the old basic information for granted because the new technology has more glitter to it. 

We are not looking at the big picture or even considering the pros and cons of a new technology . 

 But they always say, ” look on the bright side“, so this new generation is not all bad. 

Our world needs new and innovative ideas coming rapidly from this generation. And I know we should not forget our basics but we cannot take the whole lot (the old data) and use it today. It does have some demerits that will only be debugged by new ideas. So we, the new thinkers should not overlook the old data and just fly off on our own. It has never done good to anyone. 

Bottom line is that, we should not be always indulged in the new technology, rather get in touch with the oldies, tap that box to create new ideas for the world. 

Perfection…

Do you want everything perfect? Well who does not want everything perfect, complete in their life. Who doesn’t want to achieve their life goals and live to the fullest. But perfection requires lots of efforts; it needs courage to take out your own flaws and flaws in others too and also improving yourself on each and every detail. Perfection is not some instant noodles that you will get in a few minutes.

It does not matter how much tech-friendly or people’s person you are, perfection will only be achieved by your own efforts and time. It’s just the other name of the self-actualization. What I mean by that is, if you know about Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs , then on the topmost of the pyramid it has been seen that the need of self-actualization is the most prioritized. So to acquire self-actualization you have to first cover you basic needs which are (according to Maslow): [decreasing order of priority]

  • Self Actualization
  • Esteem
  • Belongingness
  • Safety
  • Biological

Many people cannot achieve it because before that they have to be fully assured about their basic needs. And if the scenario of today’s generation is not altered, then there’ll be no surprise in knowing that they are not even able to achieve their basic needs i.e. biological needs and safety needs.

But we can still try to achieve perfection. There’s no secret ingredient for that. All it needs is motivation and proper attention to yourself. How?

We humans crave for attention, for it is the brain which is doing all things (giving attention to various stimuli, perceiving, thinking and remembering). So motivating oneself is a major lift-up for perfecting oneself. And when the motivational cycle starts up, your need takes drive to its corresponding goal. There you are, all good with your new life, THE PERFECT LIFE you wanted.

They say,” Nobody is perfect. Not you or I”.

It is true though but in my opinion, anyone can have perfection. As I told above, all you have to do is cover your needs and you are having your perfect life.

All the people have different kinds of needs and their own way to achieve them. Therefore, their “perfect’ is also different.

When life is perfect, what do you feel??

Happy? Relieved ? confident in every way?… Right, I mean you must be full of positivity. After all, you have nothing to worry about now. So bottom line, a person can be PERFECT in their OWN LIFE, in their OWN WAY.

Good bye and good luck to my seniors

Hello all my seniors, this is Somya- your rightful junior and soon-to-be part of your school memories and maybe a part of your future also( for this, we need to keep in touch)- coming to you from a known source( heheh…).

You’ve spent so many years at this school, years some say will be the most formative of your lives.

Every disappointment could seem like the end of the world and conversely every victory could be felt like an ascension.

You’re going to be all over the country in a few months at different colleges and this school life will be just be a distant memory, forgotten.

And who cares in college about your small school failures; they don’t know that you failed a test or couldn’t come first in a race or couldn’t  become student of the year. No one would be knowing about your school failures, there in college. So what they want to REALLY know ?? They want to know the ORIGINAL YOU.And all these worse moments (if any) are part of the BIGGER YOU which will make the person who you are today and will be tomorrow.

You are the teller of your own stories.

KNOW THIS: LIFE ISN’T FAIR.

It’s not just meritocracy. Getting a merit in academic, sports or in extra-curricular activity is a gateway pass to your college, but you are more than this. Your whole personality, your own self will actually result in what kind of life you choose in college.So do not rely on luck or charity.

Be the hero of your own goddamn story because if you’re not , you’ll end up in a sad, pathetic life. Got it??

So, all the best for all your exams of different sorts in life!!

We juniors will utterly miss you all. Hope to see you soon.

Lost

Ever thought about being lost?

Lost, in the room packed with people but filled with meaninglessness; in an unrequited love; a love once alive but withered because of betrayal; in a place where you can shout out to all your fears disguised as silence; or in your own utopian  world full of passion and zeal.

To be honest, I got lost between these two-three months, because I seriously had no idea of what I am doing. I was just following orders like a robot. I didn’t get any thoughts to let them out here. But  my head felt like it was out of storage for more information, like I got so much on plate but still nothing  fills up my crave.This is not the “lost” I wanted. What I wished for, was to be engrossed in my passion and live through my life with that lovable work. i wished for being lost in thoughts of someone, lost in the nature and lost in the happiness in my brio. I will be much happier to be lost in my own solitude because I cannot choose my “lost” myself, but I can make it.

People are so much engrossed in their paper-thin life, that they have made it themselves like this. They are now so fragile and  into their own egotism-induced bubble, they can’t even be considered as a lost case, because they have not even tried once to find themselves . they have made a so-called pity wall to hide themselves from the truths of world. They don’t listen to the help other people try to give, because they think this help will loan them big time, according to the laws of the bubble. It’s like they have actually lost their consciousness but think they have found their utopian coma.

People are so much insecure that they get mad about not getting love from someone they think they love. It is their own custom-made depressing thoughts that are crowding in their mind and blocking them to create any affection towards other person. This trail goes on, from ones mind to the next person connected to him/her. They should be listening when the other person is trying to get in your life. They should not be judgemental, but have an objective mind at that instant. Judge only when you got all your aspects on that person.

All you have to do is to find the unwanted happiness, because if you only thought about yourself all the time, you’ll be SELFISH and then you will be back into your bubble.

Don’t push your life forcefully, it will be lost AGAIN. Push only when you think it is the last choice.

Make the “lost” you want, you can. I know you will.